Toxic Goal #12 - I am not good enough

There are times in our life when it's easy to fool ourselves. We suffer from stress and overwhelm and yet the deadlines arrive relentlessly. As a young man I was guilty of negating my responsibilities and in so doing I gave my friends, family and colleagues the opportunity to treat me like a doormat. People close to you will do it totally unconsciously, simply because you haven't created any boundaries.

Your internal dialogue is critical to your success. The most important story is the story that you tell yourself. If the story reverberates around inability and damaged self-worth, this will seriously hold you back.

When I realised this, I realised I needed to take action to prevent people from dumping their work (the work they were not interested in) on me. The word 'no' was not a word I used very often. Although I had a reputation for being cooperative and collaborative, people did rather take advantage of my strong work ethic. I thought I was making friends and winning influence, but my desk was a refuse dump for their unwanted projects. 

My inability to say 'no' created a lot of anxiety. I felt unworthy that I was unable to negotiate with colleagues about my workload. And because I was unable to negotiate these simple outcomes I felt that I wasn't good enough. 

When you tell yourself that often enough it begins to look true. But it wasn't. It took a while. A long road to recovery but there isn't anything that you cannot learn. I invested a great deal in my own personal development. I learnt how to say no and mean it. I learnt how to negotiate. I learnt how to speak confidently. I learnt to defend myself and reward myself for my achievements.

Everybody is capable of greatness - if that's what they truly want.

Make an appointment with yourself to start this invaluable work straight away. Now is the time. Don't sit around waiting for the right moment. Take action now! You are more than enough for anybody.

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