What was your biggest stumbling block as a young person?
When I was young I was not particularly motivated; around my studies, work or relationships.
In fact, I felt that there was a big hole in my life.
I lacked a sense of belonging, identity and ambition. I had no long-term plans and every day would drift by rather like the last. Neither terrible nor memorable.
My peers seemed much more focused than I, and that made things worse. I made friends easily and would lose them just as quickly.
One day, I was talking to a colleague about my rudderless life, and he asked me about my lack of ambition. There was a rather judgemental regime at home. Mistakes were met with blame and derision. It was easier to do nothing. My dad’s favourite saying was ‘never volunteer for anything’.
‘If I were in your position, I’d feel exactly the same way,’ he said. ‘However, have you ever made an exception?’
‘Yes, I offered to make a speech at work once, and I almost died of embarrassment. My volunteering days are over now. I thought it would help me, but I was wrong.’
I dreaded public speaking because I felt bad about myself, and my background. Why would anybody want to listen to me?
It was pointed out that I needed to make more exceptions, and over time, that was inevitable. I grew, I became more mature, more motivated. I moved to London. I became competitive and started to take work seriously. After this awakening I could now smell the coffee.
So, when I changed the relationship with myself, everything began to change. I had created a story which at last defined me. The change was slow at first and then it built momentum.
Before I knew it, I was working in an IT training department for a global company and travelling around the world. I remember my first trip to Mauritius.
It was like a royal visit. Picked up at the airport in a limo. Swimming in the Indian Ocean. Snorkelling in the warm waters. Watching a huge orange sun disappear behind the palm trees.
As I drank a cold beer, I wondered why I’d suffered panic attacks as a young man.
The most important story that you ever tell, is the story that you tell yourself. If your story is optimistic and ‘can do’, that’s your outcome. If your story is gloom and doom, it will seem like that whether it is or it isn’t.
Have you ever felt bad about yourself?
Have you ever let yourself down?
Have you ever betrayed your real value?
If you answered yes to those three questions you’ll have an uncomfortable relationship with yourself.
It’s never too late for change. And you don’t need the cavalry to help you.
You know that you can change. You know what needs to be polished up a little. You know that you can take those first few steps to an easier relationship with yourself.
If the answer is yes, give me a day or two to work with you in London and I will change the course of your life and career. I will help you find the real ‘diamond’ within.
Because you’re worth the investment.
If the answer is yes, join me on my next public speaking course and I’ll see you in London one day soon. Start thinking about the story you’re going to tell yourself and the group.
Are you ready to make an exception?
You won’t regret it.