Public Speaking Mindset
I remember my first speech at work. The speech that never was.
I was 18, a civil servant and had never spoken in public before.
That day, I had met my new manager for the first time, and we had a collaborative discussion about current projects and how I felt I could best contribute.
A few days later, there was a meeting, and without forewarning, my manager suggested to the twenty attendees that Vince had some good ideas on the topic.
At this point, I sat in my chair, unpleasantly thinking that my name had been used unexpectedly. Then there was a nudge on my arm and the sound of colleagues urging that I speak.
For somebody who was quite gregarious and the crushing bore at many parties, I was surprised how my brain shut down so quickly.
Chatting and talking – fine. But public speaking is different. It’s a skill. It must have purpose and ideally clarity. The only beneficial thought that struck me as progressive was to leave the room.
I shook my head and tried to smile as my face turned purple and sweaty, and I was struggling to breathe. Then my legs underwent temporary paralysis as I faltered to stand. I asked if they could give me a few moments as I sat down, and thankfully, they left me and never returned.
My teenage pride got the better of me. Who wants to have a humiliating experience in front of their colleagues?
I learnt three new words that day – impromptu and panic-attack.
Thinking on your feet and articulating a coherent business message was a new prospect. One which initially overwhelmed me. I have since developed impromptu speaking as the cornerstone of my work. My favourite speaker's mantra is “Don’t just get ready – stay ready!”
Not long after, I started to attend speaker clubs. One evening, I was talking to the chairman of the event and discussed my issue with him. He gave me some invaluable advice. He told me to forget everything I knew about public speaking (that didn’t take long). Then he talked me through a mindset which he had built his communication skills on.
- Respect – whoever you’re talking to, talk to them with respect. What would you anticipate in return?
- Humility – you might be the smartest person in the city, but nobody cares. Audiences attend for their own benefit. The role of the speaker is to deliver audience value. Otherwise, it’s an empty experience all round.
- Sincerity, trust, honesty and integrity are all members of the same family. If what you say is genuine (it comes from the head and the heart), they will appreciate your efforts.
The more you focus on yourself and your desire to be loved/accepted/praised/perfect, the greater anxiety builds. The more you extend your message towards your audience, the easier it becomes. If you make it about your needs, you’re done for.
